Life is pretty good right now...

So I'm going to Vegas in two days!! And now we've moved hotels and we're staying on the strip!! That's right, on the strip!! We're staying at a hotel called Circus Circus, and we're staying in the tower right above the casino. The hotel's pretty cool, it's got an 80,000 sq foot casino, an amusement park, a circus, an arcade, three pools.....I'm so excited!!!

Jarx's friend pissed me off, though. Jarx asked me to look into staying on the strip, and I found this place. So I called him, and he told me to make sure about the deal and all that, and that once we got it we'd cancel the other one. That way, we wouldn't get there and have no room. So I called, and I booked it. And then apparenlty we can't just cancel the other hotel we had, because it's no longer affiliated with it's parent company, it's just a hotel on it's own. And so now the cancellation fee is $80. So I called Jarx's friend to talk to him about it and see what we could do, and he gets all mad because I tell him that I can't cancell Circus Circus, it's less than 48 hours. So he starts talking to me like I'm a freaking idiot, telling me that next time he or Jarx tell me something, I should listen more carefully and do what they tell me, not something else. I'm sorry, what?? I don't take orders from him. I mean, I know I was invited on their trip, but it's now as much my trip as theirs. I found both hotels, I'm the one that booked the Grand Canyon tour, I got us on the guest list at the Playboy Club. I don't really need him to talk to me like I'm a retard.

Anyways........so I'm getting a car!! Yeah, I know, isn't life awesome?? It's a 1999 Nissan Sentra. I'm going on wednesday to get my G1, and I'm gonna book my G2 for next week, after I get back from Vegas. And then, once I have my licence, I can get it insured and get my plates and stuff. And then I can drive it!!!! Anywhere I want, whenever I want!! I can't wait!! And I managed to find an insurance place that only costs about $250 per month, which really isn't too bad at all.

And so this weekend I went to Nicole's Halloween party in Hamilton, which was pretty good. And then on saturday I went to Ashley's house for Andrew's surprise bday thing, and then we all went to Big Buck's. Man, did I have fun!! It was pretty good. More fun than I thought I would have, really. Everyone was nice and no one was arguing and it was great. And everyone was drinking and dancing!! They were even drunkenly doing lapdances (something I never thought I'd see James do) and doing an Irish dance circle thing. I'm glad I went, I had a good time. The only time I thought of Anthony was when Rae asked me if what she'd heard was true, and then James came over to ask how I was doing and give me an uplifting peptalk. Haha, and I thought he hated me!! But apparenlty not. And I'm glad. It made me feel better. And I definately want to hang out with them again. Hopefully I get to.

And yeah, so I had my MRI yesterday. It wasn't as scary as I thought it would be, but man, if I was claustrophobic, it would't have gone over too well. But yeah, I still have to wait about 2 weeks before my doctor will have the results. Hopefully it's nothing bad.

And I'm now thinking of doing school part-time instead of full-time. I mean, I wouldn't get OSAP the first year anyways, I might as well work and just do one or two courses per semester. I just can't decide between advertising and pr. Meh, I won't worry about it right now. I'll worry about it after Vegas. On the plus side, I got in to Sheridan for Advertising!! And I got a call from the Humber program telling me that they wanted me in the program, but that they couldn't officially accept me until i did my test. I know, I'm awesome!!

Anyways, time to go to bed. I need a good night's sleep, since tomorrow I have to go to work all day and prolly stay late, and I also have to do laundry and pack and make sure I have everything and try to read some of the G1 book. And maybe work on my assignment a bit. Yeah, that's prolly something I should do.

And maybe I should go pack my lunch for tomorrow. That's prolly a good plan.

Nighty night.
~Susana

Just shoot me now.

So I saw Anthony this weekend. It didn't go well. In front of him, I tried to be composed and look like everything was fine. But I had way too much tequilla and tried to run away and cried a lot. And I'm sure he knew it was about him, I mean, he can't be that stupid.

So it seems like he's fine without me. And apparently, I'm not okay without him. Why do I feel like this?? I wanted him to hug me, and hold me, and come after me, and tell me he was wrong and that he wanted to try again.....I wanted so many things that I know can't happen. And knowing that they'll never happen just made it worse.

God, I want this to stop. I don't want to miss him. But I guess I just wasn't ready to see him. So next time I'm put in that situation, I think I'll leave. I don't care what everyone thinks of that. After what Sal said, I don't really care. I'm not ready to see him, and when I'm pushed into it, it obviously doesn't go well. So I think I'll just save myself the pain and the crying and all that and just not see him.

And I'm sorry if that puts everyone in an awkward position. I'm sorry if it means that people will feel bad because they can't invite me or they want me there and feel bad for leaving him out. I'm sorry. But I can't. It still hurts too much.

And no, I don't know when it'll go away or how long it'll take. And I'm sorry if it takes longer than everyone wants. But that's just how it's gonna be. At least, for now.

Anyways, I'm done my rant now. I don't know what to do about all this, and I'm tired of thinking about it. I mean, he wasn't thinking about me, so why should I still be thinking about him?? God, this sucks.

On a happy note, I went to the states and got my Uggs today, and dress shoes, and Cookie Crisp, and Pantene that they don't sell here. And we had dinner at Ponderosa. It was me, my mom, Robin, and Gaby. It was pretty fun.
Susana

Blah, blah, blah....

So I work full-time now. At ADT. My offical job title is "Installation Co-ordinator." There's so much work, it's insane!! I have to put together the paperwork for the jobs for the day, and then call and confirm each one. Then I have to check the previous day's jobs, to make sure that they're all active and working. Then I have to do invoices, and then once they're signed, I have to batch them. Then I have to book jobs. And then, if I have time, I have to sort out the order sheets and put them in files. Yeah, it's a lot of work.

But you know, it's fun. I like the ppl I work with, and some of the sales reps are pretty freaking good looking. So it's a pretty good place to work now. I make enough money to do a few things I want. Like trips. I want to go on many trips. So far, there's Vegas and the Dominican, and I want to go to New York. I just have to find someone to go with me. And maybe Banff or Whistler. And maybe El Salvador. And then Macchu Picchu!!!!!!

Anyways, I have a year and a half to get in shape, since I'll need to be fit to go to Macchu Picchu. According to the website, it's not super hard, but it still is a 40-km hike through the mountains. Including three mountain passes. The highest at over 4000 ft!! And then the hard part, a bridge, and then through the Sun Gate into the city. I will do it!!!!!

So maybe it's time I go sign up for the gym. Haha, I should do that soon!!

Anyways, I'm off to walk to the mailboxes with Robin. And to have a smoke.
Bye bye for now.
Susana