30 Days of Truth: Some­thing you never get com­pli­ments on.

So I'm back on this 30 Days of Truth thing. I kinda wanna finish it. So, on to the next one: Something I never get compliments on.

I can't really think of something I never get complimented on, so I guess I'll write about something people often tell me I need to work on fixing, or sucks about me, or whatever. So I've got two: my laziness and my lack of drive and ambition, and my terrible handling of money.

So as most of you know, the way I live my life is simple: if I can do it tomorrow instead of today, I will. Procrastination has always been something I practice regularly. This goes for everything in my life - health-related (I should so be going to the gym), work (I shouldn't be writing this now), writing (I really should update my soccer blog), and everything else you can think of. It is probably one of the things about me I get shit for the most often. I know I need to change it, and I will...later.

My way of money management, or lack thereof, is what I hear the most of. I can make an awesome budget on paper, but I can never translate it to real life. I spend before I pay bills, I go places and do things before I even consider how I'm going to pay everything I need to. I buy pointless things and spend tons on food and eating out. I waste money and having nothing to show for it. I suck at paying people back. Trust me, I know. I've heard it all. I've tried to change it, but it never happens. Maybe I'll leave my debit card locked up?? If anyone knows of a way to do better at this, let me know!!

So there you go. I'm sure if you ask people who know me, they can come up with more. But those are the two I'd say I hear the most.

~ Suz

Neeeeed rum!! But still, happy week overall.

So it's been a month, and I thought I'd stop by and say hello. So I guess it's time to update yet again?? Not much has happened, really, but I guess I should start.

So the Toronto Star was looking for people to be bloggers for the provincial election. Every blogger would get a riding, and cover all issues for that riding. They'd do at least one story a week, and three the week of the election. I figured I had nothing to lose, so I filled out the application and sent it off. That was two weeks ago.

And then yesterday they got back to me. And I got it!! I'm super excited!! I know it's not paid, and it's not really a regular writing job, but still, I got it!! They're gonna have a page for each blogger, with picture, bio, and links to all posts. And all the posts will be up on their site!! And possibly in the newspaper!! I am seriously excited. I need to find a way to use this a step towards more news writing and jobs.

For my regular, paid work, I'm still at RBC. They keep extending my contract, which makes me happy. I'm hoping they decide to turn it into a permanent, full-time position. I guess for now I'll just keep my fingers crossed.

I was supposed to go camping this weekend, just Matt and I, but sadly, we can't go. I can't say I'm not upset, 'cause I am, but I know it's not Matt's fault. I was just so looking forward to NOT being here this weekend, it's kinda hard to be happy that plans are cancelled. But Matt has to work, so here I stay. But we are planning to reschedule it, and I'm super happy that he's agreed to go to Tobermory that weekend. I love it up there. It'll be uber cold, but it's too pretty to not go there. Maybe I can find someone with a portable generator?? Or maybe, if you're the one who has mine (it went missing), you can give it back to me!! I'd appreciate it.

So this weekend instead I'm going to the Canada vs. St Lucia world cup qualifier, and I'm kinda excited. You know, I've been to quite a few games this year, for someone who doesn't like sports. But I'm excited. Also, I plan to include rum. Lots of rum. I really have been wanting some lately. I'll settle for tequila, too :)

I'm also planning to bring down all the furniture in the room and bring all of mine up. Also, paint the room. I'm thinking brown with pink (or maybe teal) accents. Also, poem on the wall. I'm gonna put the Riddle of Strider (yes, I am a nerd). It's gonna look awesome. Hopefully.

I'm also hoping to maybe work on my writing. I need to do something with it. I have to decide if my love of writing and blogging will ever win over my love of lazy. My soccer blog could be so good, if I wasn't lazy. I also started another one, but I don't want to put it up here. Maybe once it has a few ppl following it I'll do it. Maybe. Also, my story needs working on. I'll never get better, or get anywhere, if I don't work on it!! Must get on that.

And for those who'd like to know, Nelson got into school for January. He's going to Humber, for something computer-related. Network technician?? Maybe. Either way, it's super news and I'm uber happy for him!! So if you see/talk/BBM/msg/text/stalk/whatever him, tell him congrats!!

Wow, that was more than I planned to write. So I think I'm done. Also, I'm at work, so I should really be focusing on that. And I still have to come up for a title for this shit!! Ugh. Why is life so hard??

~Suz

If I wrote more often, I could come up with better titles than "an update".

So it's been a while since I wrote, and it's time for yet another super quick update. That's all this blog seems to have, sporadic updates.

So what's new?? Lots. Will I mention it all?? Nope, that's too much work. So we'll do a point-form sorta update.

Work: I'm at RBC. Still on contract, but so far they keep extending it. Keep your fingers crossed that they keep me!! I don't work at a branch, it's an office position at one of their many head offices. As of January, my position will be part of the IT department, which is weird, and I'll be in a building in front of the CN Tower. It's gonna be awesome!! I like the ppl I work with, too. They're pretty cool. I think it's time we did dinner and drinks again!!

Living Space: I'm back at my mom's. I suck. I don't know when I'll move back out. I hate that I'm 27 and still living at home. Why must I fail at everything??

Health: I've gained weight again. Sadly, I'm gonna HAVE to start going to the gym again. I hate it, but it must be done. And I'll have to go back on the diet too. Once again, why must I fail at everything????

Love: I'm still with Matt. He's still awesome. I'm still happy. :) I think things are going great. If they're not, well, feel free to let me know, Matt!!

Family: We don't hate each other. We even all went to the beach, just us siblings. And Gaby's bf. And no one died!! My mom is seeing a new guy. He's pretty cool, and he makers her very happy. So I'm super happy for her.

Friends: Still don't see most of them too often. I've now got like 4 different groups of friends, and making time to see them all, separately, is hard!! But I am seeing the Latin crew this weekend, and then I'm going to a party with some people I haven't seen in years. Some since high school!! It's gonna be awesome!!

Money: Need more. Spend too much. Have to learn to save. Still suck at managing.

So there you go. Updated. I would promise to try harder to update or tell you that I'll update soon...but I'd be lying. So let's just be honest: I'll update again in six months.

Okie, bye bye.

~Susana

A Happy Update - I know, so rare!!

Hallo there, pretty people!!

So I thought I'd do a quick update. It's been like three weeks since I turned old, so I guess it's time for an entry.

First off, work. So I've just been hired as a freelance reporter for the Mississauga News. Now, this isn't a full-time, monday to friday job. It's more of an on-call thing, where if one of their employees can't cover something, or they have people on vacation, then they call me. The upside to this is that this is a paid journalism job. As in, I will get assignments, I'll write them up, and they'll be printed. And they can all go into my portfolio, and hopefully that means I'll be able to get a full-time writing job soon. So this is super great. I am now officially a journalist. High school goal: complete!! :D

On to something else awesome: the first weekend in April I'm going up to Ottawa with a bunch of people to attend my first ever NHL game!!! I'm not a hockey fan, but I am super excited!! It's Ottawa vs. Toronto. I'm really looking forward to it. I'm glad Nick invited Jess and I. Maybe it'll turn me into a hockey fan?? I can always try :)

My fan fiction stories are now up. Two are one-shots (so basically a short, one chapter story), and one is multi-chapter. So far only one chapter is up, but I'm working on it. I've already had a few people put it on alert, which makes me incredibly happy. I've also worked on my other fiction story, In The Midst Of Lies, but I haven't posted the new chapters yet. Maybe tonight I will. Or tomorrow. Soon, I promise!!

My allergies are getting better. I'm on week three of the weekly shots, and it's gotten bearable now. I no longer want to rip my skin off all the time. Just sometimes. Which is way better than before, though, so I'm glad. It'll be great to not be covered in scabs and scars from freaking hives and allergies. It's just stupid.

My back started to go out again, but I refused to sit at home and cry about it this time, so it actually only lasted a few days. And most of those days were okay: I was walking around, sitting, standing, driving...even wearing heels and dancing!! Sunday was bad (it started saturday night), but after that it was okay. I think I'm actually going to look into it, though, and see what can be done about it. I can't live the rest of my life afraid of lifting something heavy, or turning the wrong way too fast, or bending funny.

So yeah, that's my update. I think it's a happy update, overall, which is kinda awesome. I like it when things go well, even if it's small things. Maybe the upward trend will continue?? I think it's about time I see some good and not shittiness. Anyways, I'll try to update ITMOL later. And you guys can all check out my fanfic stories here if you guys want.

Bye bye for now!!
~Suz

Ewww, I'm turning old tomorrow!!

So I guess it's time I update everyone on my life. It's been a while since I wrote a non-30 Days of Truth post. Although I should prolly get back on track with those posts too.

So, work. I am, once again, unemployed. The last place I was working, Vengeo, was an interesting place, with a program that i do actually like, but not the best work environment for me. There was a lot to be done, and I was fulfilling like 4 roles. Although I did enjoy writing the news release and the newsletter and all the PR stuff, it's prolly for the best that I'm not there anymore. I do miss my laptop, though.

And so I'm looking for a new job. I'm hoping to find something in the media field, preferably with writing or editing or something like that involved. I'd love to be able to write for a living. So everyone should just keep their fingers crossed. Also, if you see something you think I'd be great in, please let me know!!

I'm still living with Benny, and it's still going pretty well. I've met a bunch of her Latvians, and they're pretty awesome. Although I don't agree with her insistence that I need to leave my boyfriend for a Latvian guy, I do agree that they're pretty awesome. And good looking. Living downtown is still pretty awesome, and I'm getting the hang of being able to wander around and find almost anything to eat or buy or see or do. And my apartment, although haunted, is still great. It's more homey now, since we have blinds and curtains and a slightly bigger TV.

Matt and I are doing okay. Things after New Year's were a bit iffy, and we didn't see each other for like two weeks. He was off in Montreal, and I did something that, even unintentional, was not cool. But we've talked, and I think we're doing pretty good now. I'm trying to be more open and to talk to him about things instead of wallowing and shutting him out. It's hard, but I'm really trying. Also, I'm trying to be less of a bitch and more upbeat. It's not easy, since I feel bitchy and moody and down are my natural states, but you know, I'm trying.

Things are good health-wise, except for my crazy allergies. I've been told I have to have an allergy shot every week, which sucks, but hopefully it'll make the crazy itching stop. I'm gonna scratch my skin off soon!! I ordered the serum, but sadly, it takes sic weeks to get here, and it's only been like three. I really hope it comes soon.

So I turn 27 tomorrow. I'm not gonna lie, that's pretty old. Where did time go?? It doesn't seem like it was that long ago that I was 19 and thinking I had years before I had to be an adult. And it kinda sucks, 'cause I look on facebook and see people getting married, having kids, and buying houses, and being adults, and I feel like I'm no where near that stage in my life. But I guess everyone hits that at different times?? Regardless, I hope soon I can be one of the adults, settled into a career and working towards a home and a family. I don't even know if I want kids, but still, I want to get to the stage where that is an option.

Ugh, I think I'm just getting old. At least my party will be fun times!! At least, I hope it will be.

Anyways, that's my update for now. Maybe you'll get one in another few months?? But don't worry, at least you'll get a few more 30 Days of Truth updates soon!!

~Suz

30 Days of Truth: Some­thing peo­ple seem to com­pli­ment you the most on.

So I thought about this one, and it's taken me a while to come up with what people compliment. I've come up with my writing, and my personality (I know, that's super surprising to some of you).

My writing is something that most people will compliment me on, if they've seen it. Sometimes, people I didn't know were reading my stuff will tell me they liked it, which is super awesome to hear. Sometimes I'll get messages from people I've never met in places I've never been telling me that they liked what I wrote, or that they agree, or that they disagree...still, having a total stranger care enough to write a comment is awesome. Now if only I could find a writing job, that would be great!!

Surprisingly, my personality gets me a lot of compliments. If someone were to ask me to describe myself, I'd use words like bitchy, moody, or lazy. But for some reason, a lot of the people who know me tell me how much they appreciate my friendliness, my enthusiasm, my selflessness, my willingness to help out, my ability to listen and offer advice, and so many other things I would have never used to describe me.

So yeah, those are the two I get the most. I get hit on a surprising amount, so I'm assuming that people think I'm good looking, but don't normally tell me that. My awesome boyfriend tells me that all the time, though :D That makes me happy.

~Suz

30 Days of Truth: Some­one you need to let go, or wish you didn’t know.

There are actually a lot of people that fit in this category. I've recently come to the conclusion that a lot of people in my life are not healthy for me. This doesn't make it any easier for me to walk away from them. As we all know, I will fight forever to make something work...until I can't anymore.

I've actually been thinking a lot about this recently. I would absolutely love to lead a drama-free life and just be happy in the knowledge that all the people I know are honest with me and would have my back if I needed them....but that's sadly not the case. I don't really believe that everyone I know would stand behind me if I needed them to.

I'm not a fan of fake people. I try to be honest, and I tell people what I think and how I feel 90% of the time. I don't want to talk about someone behind their back and then pretend that I'm their friend when I'm with them. I don't want to beat the same topic to death and I don't want to hate anyone. But at the same time, I'm not sitting her listing everyone that I'm thinking of, because like I said, I'm only honest 90% of the time. It's not that I hate them or want to never speak to them again, I just wish it could be different.

A few people I really did wish I could let go or wish I'd just never met: my dad, my ex, my mom's ex, a few people at Lavalife. Yep, that's about it.

30 Days of Truth: Some­one you didn’t want to let go, but just drifted.

Well, this would be an incredibly long list. I've come to the conclusion that I am terrible at keeping in touch with people. I don't call, I don't always go to events I'm invited to, I don't txt or send msgs.

I try to stay in touch, I do. Well, I guess Facebook doesn't really count, so maybe I don't, then. It doesn't help that my phone number has changed a million times in the last 10 years, that I've moved a few times, and that I don't work at the same location.

I don't actually hang out with anyone from high school, much less elementary school. That bothers me, 'cause there were tons of people that were awesome and that I'd love to see again, but like always, I never do anything about it. The only people I hang out with that I met in high school didn't even go to Pocock!! And the few people in my life that went to Pocock I met long after I (and they) had left.

And what about STM people?? What about the BFFs??? I suck. Maybe it's about time I start msging ppl and seeing if we can catch up. Maybe it'll be awesome!!

So don't be surprised, if you haven't heard from me in a while, to get a call or msg or facebook post from me. It's just me missing you.

~Suz

30 Days of Truth: Someone who has/had made your life hell

Hmmmm...how to answer this one. Well, I'm gonna take the easy (and kinda truthful) way out, and say no one. There really isn't anyone who has made my life incredibly hellish, and there definitely isn't anyone who has done it purposely and for a prolonged period of time.

I think it'd be unfair to name people here who have done something that made my life difficult for a small period of time, or who did something, not on purpose, that made my life hell.

I can think of a lot of people who have done shit to me that makes my life hard, or made me feel worthless, or have done what they can to bring me down. But I don't really want to start a list of everyone who has ever hurt or wronged me.

Also, I'm trying to have less drama and gossip and I'm trying to learn to let things go, so that's all I'm going to say on this one.

~Suz

30 Days of Truth: Someone who has made your life worth living for

So this one is harder. I guess it depends on what they mean by "made your life worth living for." I'm gonna assume it's not meant in a "I-love-you-so-much-and-I-can't-live-without-you" way, but more as someone who has made your life enjoyable or has helped make your life more fun and interesting. Someone who is there for you when you need them and can cheer you up if they have to. Not necessarily someone you admire, just someone who you can call a good friend.

So I thought about this, and I'm going to have to say two people fit into this for me. I'm going to have to say my mom and Jarx.

I picked my mom because seeing everything she's given up for us makes me want to show her it was worth it. Watching her struggle and deal with shitty jobs and low income and four kids makes me realize that someone out there loves me unconditionally and will do everything she can, and give up anything she needs to, to make me happy and safe and loved. And that makes me want to live my life and do great things and succeed. One day, I hope she'll be able to look at my life and be proud of the person I've become and the things I've done, and she'll realize that what she did meant the world to me.

Jarx...well, I promised him I'd name him in something :p But no, really, he helps. Lets me ramble on about the shit in my life, tries to give me advice he knows I won't listen to, comes over and eats my food....but he's there if I need him. And I'm determined we should go on more trips. We have fun, and you know it!!

....so trip soon, Jarx??

~Suz

30 Days of Truth: Something you hope to never have to do

Well, this one really wasn't too hard. I hope I never have to watch a friend die. I hope I never have to bury a child. I hope none of my friends or family ever go missing, get kidnapped or abducted, or just disappear. I hope I never have to watch someone I care about spiral down into self-destruct mode and lose everything in their life.

Yeah, short, but there's really not m uch to elaborate on.

~Suz